On a very serious note.

Remember my sweet Bianca, who I wrote about here, who would have celebrated her 20th birthday this month?

The story of Bianca's death is one that I hesitate to share, because there is so much emotion, such vile controversy surrounding the events of that day.  I wasn't there; I cannot personally attest to the true happenings of that Memorial Day night in 2008, three weeks before Bianca was meant to graduate from Beverly Hills High School.  What has been reported is that Bianca was in an argument with a "friend" of hers over a boy, while standing on a high-rise apartment balcony in Century City, a pocket of West Los Angeles. 

It is still a mystery to what happened next, but our spunky, silly, outgoing and full-of-life firecracker of a friend died that night, as a result of a 15 floor fall from the balcony where she was last known to be alive.

It was under investigation, and theories of what happened immediately encompassed our tight-knit Beverly Hills community.  Anyone that knew Bianca felt that Law Enforcement's ruling of a suicide was not only pathetic, but also an insult to the very spirit that was our dear friend and an additional heartbreak to those that loved her so much.

We have spent the past two years and three months commemorating Bianca's memory by continuing to love and cherish the stories we have of her and the times that we were able to spend with her. 

As the best friend of my little sister, I vividly remember her as a constant guest at our house.  They would walk home from school their 8th and 9th grade years to spend time at our place: snacking on junk food, laughing with me, joking with our mom (who Binky jokingly always called "Miss Karen Ma'am" in honor of my mom's Southern manners and insistence on being respectful to your elders).

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Fast forward to today, when I received a call from Little Sister, who informed me that Bianca's oldest brother, Bernard, was murdered last night, along with two others, in a West Hollywood, California apartment.

There is little news reported, supposedly no witnesses, and leads are slim to none. 

You can find an article on this tragedy here.

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I've spent tonight in a bit of a haze.  I was devastated at the loss of our Bianca, in a way that I have a very difficult time putting into words.  I was at work when I got the news of her death and was so caught off-guard at the verbalization that she had died that my legs yielded beneath me, and I hit the floor.  I have taken what I experienced from the sorrow that I, and the others in Bianca's life, felt in response to this catastrophe, and I have made a conscious effort to funnel it into positive actions, thoughts, words.

However, the death of a second Khalili child and sibling in two years leaves me utterly confused.

I don't understand and am completely unable to comprehend how this much devastation can be allowed to rock one family.

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In my hesitation to share such a personalized view of these events, I opted in the end to tell these stories to you for one purpose.  I have always been a believer in everything happening for a reason, and I need to do my part in making sure that this reason comes to be, because I am having a terribly hard time grasping it at this moment. 

So here is my thought to you:

Please remember to love.  To show love, respect, and kindness to those around you.  To those you spend each day with, yes, that's a given.  But also to be kind to those you pass on the sidewalk, to the ones you work with day in and day out, to those you may have not yet come across but will someday, somehow.  Offer help to those that need it.  Respect yourselves, respect others, and respect the lives and feelings of the people that you encounter.   

What are we here for, if not to take care of one another and try to make for our friends, and for strangers, each day better than the last?  Cliche, maybe.  But just so vital to life.

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With sorrow, but also with love and hope-

Lacey