After the post I did last week on The Dating Game, my cousin sent me a link to an article on the theory of women being Gaslighted, and it was a very interesting read. I really, really encourage you all as both men and women to read this article. It's quite eye opening, and as for women, I am sure most of us can say we've been on the receiving end of this, and for men, I am certain that most can say they've been on the serving side of gaslighting. Click here for the article.
I'd love to hear your thoughts.
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(photo source.)
7 comments :
Lacey, I love how this whole discussion has developed! After reading the article, I immediately thought about some experiences you and I and others have had in blogging. This "gaslighting" concept is so prevalent in blogging. Someone writes a post that is offensive. Another blogger writes a comment and explains why that post was hurtful. Blogger friends circle the wagons (love a good old-timey idiom) and call out the blogger who commented, calling her overly sensitive, crazy, can't take a joke, looking for an excuse to get upset, etc etc.
It's not just men who commit this form of emotional manipulation, but we women do it to each other. Which is just plain sad.
I love that you shared this! I just thought it was such an interesting thing, and I didn't know it actually had a name. Hopefully this helps other people as much as it did you and I.
Wow, thought provoking. I agree with this. Things happen and you are allowed to be upset without being simply pushed away with a "you are being dramatic". I have a male roommate and he really does listen to me and comment in a manner that lets me see a situation differently. Yet he does too often say "women are dramatic, women blow up everything, women are too quick to think they are dying from a disease you only can get in South America( where they have never been)". And I take it with a grain of salt, we are friends. But now I look back and see, Wow he is generalizing, not all women do these things. I have a right to think, to do, to feel, how I feel.
Maybe we are all damaged goods from this society and we as a whole population need to heal.
I totally agree with my sister on this one. I think women do it to each other a lot. I also think though that people do this in relation to being "politically correct" as well. A friend at work was just telling me about a group of people there who were complaining about having to say "sitting cross-legged"instead of saying "sitting Indian style" because they thought it was being overly sensitive and "Who would be offended anyways??" I think in the article, it talked a lot about the manipulation that comes from gaslighting... and I think it's similar in the example I gave. I also think that women apologize far too often!
Totally agree with you.
Kids Games
exactly!!!! oh my gosh this article is awesome... my ex used to tell me i was overreacting all the time when he would go mia for hours and hours and i'd be worried something ahppened to him and just ask him to text or call so i know his plane landed or got homef rom work ok or whatever... and then when he'd say that i would get even more upset because it wasn't be who was the crazy one... he was being inconsiderate and trying to turn the situation around on me
While reading this I had to stop. I was like hold up- I have done this. And I know girls who do the whole serious comment in a text with a smiley face and it confuses the shit out of me everytime. I'm definitely going to be more aware of this when it happens now. Very interesting.
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